06:28
Faizan
While you may not be new to the dating scene, vying for the heart of a single mom may land you in virgin territory. Unlike other women that you have dated, a single mom has to consider her own feelings, as well as how her relationship with you will affect the life and feelings of her child. Learning to plan kid-friendly dates, being understanding about her scheduling limitations, and realizing that her priorities may not always place you first are just some of the considerations to make before pursuing a single mom.
Plan your dates, phone calls and interaction in advance. One of the biggest differences between single life and life with children is the amount of planning involved in raising a child. Nap time, homework and quality time are all major components of a mom's day that you may not be used to. To account for her busy schedule, set up a time when it is good to call, preferably after her kids go to bed, and plan dates or trips around alternating custody schedules or trips to grandma's house.
Pace yourself, don't rush to be intimate. Sociologist Sharon Sassler, along withher fellow researchers Fenaba Addo and Daniel Lichter, suggest in their August 2012 publication in the "Journal of Marriage and Family," that early sexual involvement can lead to less long-term relationship happiness among women than when compared to couples who waited to become intimate.
Reassure the single mom in your life that you are supportive of her deciding when you will meet her children and in what capacity you will interact with them. Slowly being introduced into a child's life may help the child to adjust to a new figure in her life.
Allow your relationship with her children to evolve naturally. You're not their parent, and they make take some time to warm up to you. Engage in child-friendly activities such as going to the park or meeting them at the zoo to break the ice.
Avoid bad-mouthing her ex, especially in front of her children. Regardless of the reason for their breakup, her ex likely plays a significant role in both her and her children's lives. There will be times when they disagree, but talking negatively about the father of her children may serve only to upset her or the kids. Instead, be supportive of her decisions in the matter.
Plan your dates, phone calls and interaction in advance. One of the biggest differences between single life and life with children is the amount of planning involved in raising a child. Nap time, homework and quality time are all major components of a mom's day that you may not be used to. To account for her busy schedule, set up a time when it is good to call, preferably after her kids go to bed, and plan dates or trips around alternating custody schedules or trips to grandma's house.
Reassure the single mom in your life that you are supportive of her deciding when you will meet her children and in what capacity you will interact with them. Slowly being introduced into a child's life may help the child to adjust to a new figure in her life.
Allow your relationship with her children to evolve naturally. You're not their parent, and they make take some time to warm up to you. Engage in child-friendly activities such as going to the park or meeting them at the zoo to break the ice.
Avoid bad-mouthing her ex, especially in front of her children. Regardless of the reason for their breakup, her ex likely plays a significant role in both her and her children's lives. There will be times when they disagree, but talking negatively about the father of her children may serve only to upset her or the kids. Instead, be supportive of her decisions in the matter.
Posted in: Singles & Couples
