04:20
Faizan
When it comes to giving "the talk" about sex and relationships, a 2010 study by the Guttmacher Institute reveals that some parents feel uncomfortable by the thought -- 40 percent, to be exact. While talking to your preteen about sex can be awkward, it can also be educational and fulfilling. By adjusting your information based on age and making sex a frank topic in your household, talking about sex doesn't have to make you or your preteen feel uncomfortable.
Talk to your preteen about sex only when she is ready. The Palo Alto Medical Foundation suggests age 12 as a good time to initiate the conversation, but your child should already know things like the correct names for anatomy and sexual boundaries. The purpose for the preteen talk is to help your child understand sexual relationships and to give her the tools to make good decisions regarding sex.
Be frank about sex, suggests Dr. Laura Berman, a sex therapist working with Oprah.com. She points out that the main goal of talking to your preteen about sex is to indicate that it's completely normal and a part of growing up. Use proper names for her body parts and take a straightforward attitude in talking about what her friends might be saying about sex, self-stimulation and the changes she's noticing in her body via puberty. If you act awkward and embarrassed, she'll learn that sex is something that is awkward and embarrassing and may avoid asking you questions in the future.
Build on the knowledge that she already has about sex and give her the information she needs for her age. A preteen probably doesn't need to know about contraception and STDs like a teen might, but she should know about sexual pressure, things that could lead to sex, choosing a sexual relationship and the basics of her body.
Use everyday experiences as a catalyst to the conversation, suggests the Alabama Cooperative Extension Service. Your preteen's early sexual experiences are likely limited to what she hears at school or sees on TV. If you notice her watching a show with sexual acts, ask her what she thinks about what's happening. Or, if you overhear a friend making a sexual comment, see if your preteen understands what's being said. These organic conversations are often less embarrassing because your preteen perceives them as being about someone else, rather than herself.
Listen to your teen when she has questions and avoid losing your cool when she asks a question about sex or her body. Keep calm and be frank so she doesn't avoid asking you questions in the future. That way, "the talk" isn't a one-time thing, but an ongoing conversation in your home that gives your preteen the right tools to understand and make wise decisions about sex.
Talk to your preteen about sex only when she is ready. The Palo Alto Medical Foundation suggests age 12 as a good time to initiate the conversation, but your child should already know things like the correct names for anatomy and sexual boundaries. The purpose for the preteen talk is to help your child understand sexual relationships and to give her the tools to make good decisions regarding sex.
Be frank about sex, suggests Dr. Laura Berman, a sex therapist working with Oprah.com. She points out that the main goal of talking to your preteen about sex is to indicate that it's completely normal and a part of growing up. Use proper names for her body parts and take a straightforward attitude in talking about what her friends might be saying about sex, self-stimulation and the changes she's noticing in her body via puberty. If you act awkward and embarrassed, she'll learn that sex is something that is awkward and embarrassing and may avoid asking you questions in the future.
Build on the knowledge that she already has about sex and give her the information she needs for her age. A preteen probably doesn't need to know about contraception and STDs like a teen might, but she should know about sexual pressure, things that could lead to sex, choosing a sexual relationship and the basics of her body.
Use everyday experiences as a catalyst to the conversation, suggests the Alabama Cooperative Extension Service. Your preteen's early sexual experiences are likely limited to what she hears at school or sees on TV. If you notice her watching a show with sexual acts, ask her what she thinks about what's happening. Or, if you overhear a friend making a sexual comment, see if your preteen understands what's being said. These organic conversations are often less embarrassing because your preteen perceives them as being about someone else, rather than herself.
Listen to your teen when she has questions and avoid losing your cool when she asks a question about sex or her body. Keep calm and be frank so she doesn't avoid asking you questions in the future. That way, "the talk" isn't a one-time thing, but an ongoing conversation in your home that gives your preteen the right tools to understand and make wise decisions about sex.
Posted in: Teen Dating & Sex
