04:34
Faizan
You know the drill -- your teen daughter comes home with a dreamy look in her eyes and is suddenly doodling hearts and names on her homework or your teen son is obsessively checking his phone for text messages from his crush. It's a common scenario for parents of teens who become infatuated with one of their peers. Different than romantic love, infatuation can be harmless, but it can also lead to dangerous consequences. Watch for the signs of an unhealthy obsession and talk to your teen about healthy relationships.
Teens and Infatuation
Teens are particularly prone to infatuation for a few different reasons, as explained by psychologist Carl Pickhardt in an article for Psychology Today. First, that infatuation can often happen without a real relationship, which means your shy teen doesn't actually have to speak to a crush in order to become obsessed. Most infatuation is based on imagination, fantasy and idealism, which dramatic teens are prone to anyway. Those hours of daydreaming in class can have a teen thinking she's in love with someone she doesn't know very well or someone he's only just started dating.
The Dangers
While a harmless crush isn't a big deal, infatuation can become dangerous when it leads your teen to risky behavior. He might be more inclined to act to impress his crush, which could mean going as far as engaging in sexual acts to please the person with whom he's infatuated. It can also limit your teen's opportunity for other social experiences, especially when his infatuation isolates him from friends or stops him from considering other, healthier relationships.
Love Versus Infatuation
As a parent, you can help your teen decide if what she's feeling is love or infatuation. There are a few telltale signs of infatuation, according to the Sexuality Resource Center for Parents. Love grows over time, while infatuation happens instantaneously. When a teen is in love, she accepts that her partner -- who has reciprocal feelings -- has faults. With infatuation, the relationship is often one-sided and highly idealized, as though the crush has no faults whatsoever. Love means mutual respect, while infatuation can result in hurt self-esteem and jealousy.
What You Can Do
As a parent, teen infatuation can put you in a sticky situation. On one hand, you want to warn your teen of the dangers. On the other hand, you could risk alienating your teen by pointing out the farce. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests taking your teen's crush seriously. It may be one of his first experiences with romantic feelings and belittling them could be hurtful. Instead, talk to your teen about healthy relationships and remind him that he deserves someone who thinks he's as special as you do. You can't force your teen to stop being infatuated, but you can communicate and offer direction so that your teen can make better dating choices on his own.
Teens and Infatuation
Teens are particularly prone to infatuation for a few different reasons, as explained by psychologist Carl Pickhardt in an article for Psychology Today. First, that infatuation can often happen without a real relationship, which means your shy teen doesn't actually have to speak to a crush in order to become obsessed. Most infatuation is based on imagination, fantasy and idealism, which dramatic teens are prone to anyway. Those hours of daydreaming in class can have a teen thinking she's in love with someone she doesn't know very well or someone he's only just started dating.
The Dangers
While a harmless crush isn't a big deal, infatuation can become dangerous when it leads your teen to risky behavior. He might be more inclined to act to impress his crush, which could mean going as far as engaging in sexual acts to please the person with whom he's infatuated. It can also limit your teen's opportunity for other social experiences, especially when his infatuation isolates him from friends or stops him from considering other, healthier relationships.
Love Versus Infatuation
As a parent, you can help your teen decide if what she's feeling is love or infatuation. There are a few telltale signs of infatuation, according to the Sexuality Resource Center for Parents. Love grows over time, while infatuation happens instantaneously. When a teen is in love, she accepts that her partner -- who has reciprocal feelings -- has faults. With infatuation, the relationship is often one-sided and highly idealized, as though the crush has no faults whatsoever. Love means mutual respect, while infatuation can result in hurt self-esteem and jealousy.
What You Can Do
As a parent, teen infatuation can put you in a sticky situation. On one hand, you want to warn your teen of the dangers. On the other hand, you could risk alienating your teen by pointing out the farce. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests taking your teen's crush seriously. It may be one of his first experiences with romantic feelings and belittling them could be hurtful. Instead, talk to your teen about healthy relationships and remind him that he deserves someone who thinks he's as special as you do. You can't force your teen to stop being infatuated, but you can communicate and offer direction so that your teen can make better dating choices on his own.
Posted in: Teen Dating
